How to Stop Seeing Men as Projects

List characteristics that you find attractive in a man. Don't hold back. Be detailed about appearance, attitude, talents, morals, education level, tax bracket, everything.

Make a new list of characteristics you can't tolerate in a man. Again, be specific.

Compare the two lists and see if any characteristics contradict each other. For instance, do you have "perfect teeth" listed as an attraction, but "spends too much money on appearance" in your intolerable list? Examine closely and see the contradictions that may be causing you to see men as projects.

Create a new list with imperfections and flaws that you could tolerate, deal with and even learn to love in Mr. Right. Use your other lists if needed to spark ideas.

Keep your newest list handy, at all times. Keep it in your purse, in your car, in your wallet, your backpack; wherever you have access to it the most. Throughout the day, when you see or think of a new imperfection that you could deal with and not have to change, add it to your list.

Admit to yourself that you can't be the exception. It's not your place to fix an alcoholic just because your mother failed at it. It's not your responsibility to turn the bad boys into tame **** cats just because your little sister couldn't. Most women carry the attitude that they can do it better than someone else. This attitude only puts you in the middle of miserable relationships.

Make a goal to add one new imperfection to your "acceptable" list a day. By focusing on flaws that don't have to be fixed, you can put the mentality of seeing men as projects on the back burner, and over time, forget it entirely.

Look again at your first list of attractive qualities. Where are your priorities? If you care too much about a man's looks, then you naturally miss out on some other great qualities in a man that doesn't hold to your standards. If you care too much about social standing, then you limit your chances of finding other appealing qualities in a mate.

Practice giving up power. The desire to change someone else's behavior is often a sign of a controlling personality. Allow yourself to follow sometimes, to let someone else lead. By gradually changing your own personality, you'll find yourself not thinking of men as projects anymore, but as adventures or great possibilities.

Put yourself in the man's shoes. How would you feel if someone wanted to change you?

Find new projects. If you still have the overwhelming desire to fix a man no matter how hard you try to resist, then give yourself something else to fix. Consider a career change. There are many companies and organizations that could benefit from someone willing to go the extra mile to ensure perfection.